Weeping Soul
by littlesugarcat
Summary: A brief insight into Izumis thoughts when he rejects Meroko once again during their Meru-Meiku time. Based on the Manga Ch.13.2. [IzuMero]


**Disclamer: I do not own Full Moon wo sagashite...**

 **Yes, I'm a Meroko x Izumi shipper. I just needed to write this little oneshot (perhaps more will follow? ) because Izumi is such an interesting character.**

 **As mentioned, it's based on the Interlude about Meroko and Izumis background story in Volume 3. Ahh, the feels... I cried my eyes out when I first read it :(**

* * *

"Izumi-Kun, I love you!"

Those were the words Izumi hated the most when Meroko was around. Whenever they were at work she would find it necessary to remind him. She would always try to get his attention, when in fact he just wanted to be left alone.

Izumi was growing sick and tired of his partner. Only rejecting her gave him a certain feel of pleasure. She didn't love him, after all. How could she? He was an insufferable uncaring person. He was unlovable and he knew it.

 _One day_ … he always told himself… _she'll stop_. _One day she'll give up and turn away._

But she never did. Instead she would return, often more attached to him than before.

 _Izumi-Kun, I love you!_

 _Izumi-Kun, wait for me!_

"Izumi-Kun, I got our assignment for this week!"

It affected Izumi more than he cared to admit. It annoyed him, most of all, but also triggered something else in him. It called to his past and all these hidden memories, making him agonize over them even more than before. In reflection, all the love Meroko showered him with felt superficial and hollow. Not even the closest people in life had loved him – so why should anyone now?

Meroko was a constant reminder of the burden he carried. Therefore, Izumi hated her even more.

"If you don't give up soon -", he told her, "- you're going to get hurt."

For a moment Meroko halted, her cheerfulness fading.

"I understand," she said, her face suddenly serious and sad, as if his warning had actually reached her ears. But just as he thought it finally did, she pulled out some clothing from being her back, calling in her usual happy voice, "How about we start wearing matching outfits?"

Izumi was exasperated. "Now I know you didn't understand a word I was saying…"

Meroko fell silent, her eyes lowered. Then, she lifted her head to face him.

"You really reject people with all you have, don't you?" she said quietly, "Even though your soul is crying out."

Izumi felt a sudden yet very intense stab to his heart. He crossed his arms above his chest. But her words had touched something deep down within him, making him cringe from inner pain. Meroko smiled softly at him, her eyes full of compassion.

"I like that about you, Izumi-Kun," she said, looking him in the eyes.

It was nothing like her usual declaration of love. It wasn't even a declaration at all. Her expression was genuine and full of warmth.

For the first time, Izumi felt unable to respond. No vicious comment would come to his mind. All he could think about was Meroko and what she had just said to him.

Deep down he knew, she was right – his soul was weeping. It was struggling within the void, calling out for help, for trust, for all the love he had been craving and never received. It had destroyed him long ago.

Again, Izumi found himself rejecting Meroko. Silently this time, because he did not know what to say. It made Izumi feel dirty and all the more unworthy of her.

All the time, he was trying to trick her, wishing to rip off that mask of false affection. He wanted to prove that his suspicion was true and rub it into her face. Yet, no matter how much he disappointed her, how much he hurt her with words of rejection, she always came back to him, telling him over and over again that she loved him.

 _Could that truly be love…?_

If so, what should he do? His heart was frozen, his soul disfigured and tainted. No vow of love could ever reach it. He needed proof. He needed more than words – more than just love.

He needed to _feel_ it.

* * *

 **Perhaps there will be more! :)**


End file.
